Wednesday, February 1, 2023

Tag: worst

Honkey Holocaust movie
Over the years, Charles Manson has achieved cult hero status amongst people who are apparently willing to forgive (or forget, or just not give a damn about) the fact that he not only orchestrated the murders of nine innocent people (including 8-months-pregnant actress Sharon Tate), but also that he's...
horror movie The Night Seekers
The Night Seekers is one of those movies that’s so spectacularly bad, I'd need to review the script word by word to even come close to conveying its awfulness. It’s so fundamentally flawed, it operates on a different plane of existence. It's hard to even know what to make...
Immortal Kiss: Queen of the Night horror movie
David DeCoteau is a 30-plus-year veteran of the cheesy schlock horror filmmaking circuit, but his specialty since the turn of the century has been homoerotic horror (oddly peppered with family fare like An Easter Bunny Puppy and A Talking Cat!?!, the punctuation being part of the title). Immortal Kiss: Queen...
The Pizza Man horror movie
From Velli Entertainment, the production company who subjected you to The Black Witch Project comes The Pizza Man, a movie so bad the filmmakers couldn't be bothered to finish it. It clocks in at about 48 minutes long, credits included, and all I have to say is, Thank God....
Zombiez horror movie
This movie is so half-assed...I can't even finish the sentence. It's wretched enough that I can see how some people could enjoy it in a sadomasochistic and/or end-of-days harbinger way. Where do I start? I know; how about the fact that there are NO ZOMBIES? There are just guys who...
Woods of Evil horror movie
It's been said time and time again that some movies are so bad, they're good. While "good" wouldn't be a word I'd associate with Woods of Evil (it is evil, after all), it's pretty entertaining in its low-budget ineptitude. From cliches like crazy old men warning of danger and...
Voodoo Tailz horror movie
I knew I was in for some deep-tissue pain when this movie opened with a voiceover that sounds more like a fifth-grade book report: Every Mardi Gras, college girls have ended up missing. Nobody knows who is kidnapping the girls, but legend has it that there is a bayou cult...
Vampiyaz horror movie poster
How can you tell if a horror film is "urban"? Misspelling! If they use "z" instead of "s" or "y" instead of "i" or "da" instead of "the," your oddz R da bomb yo! The description of this shot-on-film Z-grade flick says that Jakeem (Richard Carroll, Jr.) is framed...
Vampire Assassin movie
I knew I was in trouble when I saw that the DVD cover for this film said "Vampire Assassins," while the title screen read the singular "Vampire Assassin". Damn, continuity issues before the movie even begins! The second warning sign came when 10 or 15 minutes passed without me seeing...
Urban Nightmare horror movie poster
Wow, I didn't think they made movies like this anymore...and I wish I was right. Urban Nightmare is a heinous throwback to '80s cop movies in which all minorities are ridiculously stereotyped criminals, and it's up the hard-boiled white cop to mop up the streets with 'em. In this...